Thursday, 14 April 2016

Probably for Overthinkers




Afraid,
Broken,
Lost,
That is how she feel sometimes,
Behind the face of perfection she put on at times,
Behind the beautiful dress she wears advertised in New York times,
Behind the image of a woman in control of how she reacts to things all times,
The woman who never lets her emotions spill over, she is always always all smiles
The woman who  is stable inside.

Behind all that,
Days come when she feels like nothing means a thing,
She gets a little bit too hard on herself for nothing
Maybe not a little,
Maybe a lot harder than the weight these words are carrying.
She overthinks every little choice she wants to make,
Thinks about the choices before it is even made,
How many spoons of sugar for her tea,
Should the phone be on the bed while charging or maybe it's better on the table,
Should she have nodded or simply said yes in her response,
Nodding seems  a bit rude,
Or maybe it is OK,
But why not put the effort and say yes or OK instead of simply using actions,
She isn't deaf or dumb,
She can say yes or no,
She has a voice,
Is it about her or the other person, does the other person even care?
Did they even notice she nodded her head?

And what about that time she said yes to a date,
Maybe she should have said no,
Maybe she should not have put herself in a situation where she would be asked out anyway,
The most beautiful girls are like apples,
the ones up above on the highest branch of the apple tree,
they are not reached easily by pickers and they end up thinking something is wrong with them,
Yet all along,
They are simply the best!
She is NOT supposed to be asked out!
She is a good apple, high above the trees!
Lonely but she knows her worth!

Maybe she shouldn't even be putting down her thoughts in writing,
The best people in life are the most secretive,
Or the introverts,
Maybe the best are extroverts,
Maybe it is OK to put down her thoughts.
She is no-longer aware of who she is,
Maybe is trying to find Identity and the more she seeks it,
She loses herself.
She probably needs to relax,
It is probably never that serious,


But who cares anyhow.

Sunday, 27 December 2015

Sinful Poet

So much to express,
That I supress, 
Every word every text,
For fear of Seeing it black as 
coal,
My naked soul so cold,
My nasty mind so bold,
My wicked side re-told,
Through paper and pen Re-
born,
My mind exposed,
As the sophisticated sinful 
poet.

My Name is Africa

My name is Africa:


A beauty to look at
From East to west
Reaching through vast land and sea
Incredible wildlife,
Continuous amazement to those who visit me
All you've ever wanted I have

Wednesday, 22 January 2014

ONE MINUTE AT A TIME

Sometimes we lack peace of mind,
We feel lost and unsettled,
We feel like every thing is happening with us in mind
To push us off balance,
 To frustrate us,
To make us unhappy,
and we forget to live every moment in time,
simply rushing and in our heads only thoughts of
the regrets of things we never did or did,
the hurts of the past
or simply thoughts of future plans,
completely choosing to deny the present the recognition and attention it deserves.
And we are in this persistent cycle of
 one unhappy minute to another,
Bound by the laws of a sick routine,
And the worst part is...
we don't know exactly what we subject ourselves to when we don't live the moment right before us.

How beautiful would it be
if we chose to breath the air and take in the moment with all with have
to give the person we are talking to all the attention when they speak
To think through what a teacher is saying the moment they speak
how peaceful would it be
if we tried to free our minds of all worry and simply lived the present
Hard as it may seem
There is nothing wrong with trying
Am inclined to mention God because He is the basis of my beliefs and all that I am
And when you give a try to something and take the first step
He most definately moves in

Saturday, 20 April 2013

HE IS IN CONTROL

*He is in control by Virginia Kamau*
Had a conversation with God in the morning,
I told Him all am wanting,
all am needing,
I told Him how I love Him,
how I am so lost without Him,
I told Him my hopes and dreams,
I told Him my hurts and pains,
I opened up to Him,
I was before Him,
... I let Him know how I feel.

I promised to be good,
to not forget little thngs that count alot,
I askd Him to help me,
to guide me,
I asked Him for so much.
I put my trust in Him.

He is my God my friend,
We talk every morning,
every time,
He loves me so much
It's a feeling I wouldn't trade for a anything.

He lets me cry,
lets me weep,
smile.
express myself,
my hidden emotions,
Be me,
He cares and protects,
and guides me,
I am so at peace because,
I know HE IS IN CONTROL.

Wednesday, 27 February 2013

Even When all Seems Lost


Even when all seems lost,
When you put your trust in God,
When you believe and obey the Lord,
When you desire to be in his presence,
When you want to know HIm more,
And seek Him with al your heart,
whether you are happy or sad,
 Whether your day is good or bad,
When you resolve to do HIs will,

When you choose to be good,
To worship HIm to praise HIm,
When you refuse to give up,
ON prayers and reading the Bible,
When like Jacob you beg God to bless you,
And talk to Him all night through,
He eventually will come through for you,

Everything will fall in place,
You will be relaxed Knowing that,
He is in controll,
You will find peace that surpurses al;l understanding,
You will find a friend a Dad,
The Holy Spirit will gude you,
He will show you the way,
Help you make choices, the best in every way,
You will understand,
What this joy people talk about is,
The joy of the Lord,
Will abide in you all through.

YOu will understand what it means,
to read the Bible and hear God,
speaking to you and counselling you,
You will understand what salvation is,
You will be strong and happy,
For He is with you all day.
You will have a reason to smile everyday,
For all your worries will be tsken care of,
by Christ the LOrd

You wil find your purporse,
You will know and understand,
that it is God who rules the world,
who takes care of Universe,
who knows what your future is like,
who changes and guides,
you will know the true meaning of life,
of a fulfilling life,
YOu will be the boy, Girl, Man, Woman,
He created you to be.

My BLack Barbie, Bee Bee

When I was young,
My mum bought me a black barbie doll,
I wanted a white one,
I cried and tried,
to convince her to buy me a white one,
 all in vain.
she gave me no reason,
and it remained like that.

I never used to take care of Barbie,
Never used to comb her hair,
 Or dress her up,
 until one day,
When I looked at her skin,
it was like mine,
her hair,
it was like mine,
 she was beautiful,
she was like me,
black in all aspects,
she had brown eyes,
red lips and was curvacious too,
 I realised how beautiful she was
and named her BEEBEE,

I started dressing her up,
combing her hair,
and marvelling at her beautiful black skin,
I once heard that,
The darker the berry,
the sweeter is is,
I kept her away from too much sun,
too much rain,
I took care of her,
I was so afraid,
She would start fading
and become white or light brown,
she would no longer be beautiful,
she would lose her originality,
she looked so like me,
but I was prettier,
my skin was darker,
more rich,
more beautiful.


If she could hear,
I wanted to boast,
of how I was more curvacious,
My skin was much richer,
 my eyes were bright brown,
I wanted to boast how,
I can work most night and day,
Multitask and still find time to play,
I wanted to boast of how
 I can speak my mother toungue
I can sing and dance,
I can dream and accomplish.
I wanted to boast aboutall this,
but she couldnt hear,
she was just but a plastic doll,
A beautiful black plastic barbie doll,
Her name was BEEBEE

I'm grown now,
I'm woman now,
I see now,
What mama tried to teach me in silence,
Why she refused to buy me,
the white barbie,
it taught me much,
am so in-love with myself now,
because I related with BEEBEE back then,
learnt my worth,
realised my beauty,
inside and outside,
I bet they were talking about me when they said,
the darker the berry,
the sweeter it is.